I grew up in a family that had a love for music. Everything from big band,the blues,rock n' roll,country and a bit of classical - the door was always open. Ironic that I had the most talent considering I was the youngest. Anyway,my middle brother Jamie was a huge Sabbath fan and of course got me into it and he informed me that Ozzy got the boot. Not thinking much of it and figuring he'd be back, I shrugged it off. Many months later,my brother tells me Ozzy has a new band then shows me this album he bought downtown. They had played it in store so,he already had a taste and he told me "This will blow your fucking mind". From the sound of a freight train roaring down on me,I thought it would be Sabbathesk but heavier - that 1st note changed my life/changed everything. My eye's were the size of dinner plates he told me and I was just freaking right out saying "Holy shit,holy shit,holy shit". When the album was done,I looked at my bro and said "This is MY band". I ran around telling everybody and anybody about the band/album that were or not willing to hear. I collected every article,every pic - anything I could get my 13 year old grubby hands on. Not long after,everybody was coming over to are place to hear the album (my parents were on a trip to Europe) and of course we had a few parties. Once it hit the airwaves,the juggernaut took off big time and soon everyone wanted to know who this guitarist was. Randy Fucking Rhoads - spell it right R H O A D S and don't ever forget that name. Funny thing is it (the band/album) changed my life. I was doing a lot better in school,got more involved in music - this was the time of my life. I was really pissed and still hate my older brother for not getting me tickets as promised at Maple Leaf Gardens the following year and I still hate him to this very day. Friends of mine went to the show and were just blown away at this tiny little blond guy ripping it up leaving a well worth it ringing in their ears for days. The follow up album set the wheels in motion with what I call a religious experience/change. You Can't Kill Rock And Roll is forever etched in my soul and became my new found religion. Of course tragedy reared it's ugly head just over 2 years in. March break,my brother runs into the living room and yells "Ozzy died". No way,get lost right......right......we waited to hear more and (sorry,I had to stop for a sec....still cry like it was yesterday)......then the heartbreak that never healed became clear. It was Randy. I locked myself in my room and cried for 3 days. I just spiraled out of control after that. Kept getting booted out of school,started taking any drug,drank very heavily,fights,therapy....ran the gamut. I'm 47 now,been drug free for over 15 years now,quit drinking hard liquor. I lost a lot of good people along the way due to O.D's,accidents,murders,illness. The passing of my best friend mom 8 years ago stung as bad as Friday,March,19th 1982. Mom had a rough battle with breast/brain cancer but,she made me a promise. She said she would let Randy know how her little boy loved him and is still heart broken and would hug him for me. I made her a promise I would get back to being right again. It's an uphill battle from time to time but,when I hear any of those 2 albums/boots it's a reminder of whom I am and that I am still here. I passed the love for Randy on to my nephew. Watching him grow up and his favourite guitarist to date is Randy. He's 23 now and headed to L.A. a few months ago. He really tried to visit Randy for me/for us but,sadly couldn't. I understood,the timing was off. I turned around to get us a beer and he said "Oh,by the way....." (made me cry).....handed me a new Tribute t shirt. I hugged Steve and cried for 5 minutes only to go put that shirt on. The light still shines and Randy is that candle I will never let go out. Randy for me is love/hope/faith and being the person I really am....that 13 year old kid with eye's the size of dinner plates.
I tried my best to explain it but,it was hard crying halfway through it so please forgive me.
