Ultimate Rhoads

today was the most awful of days..

the day i was about to break up with my girlfriend, is the day we get the phonecall saying that time is running out for granddad and is deteriating faster and much worse than before.

me and my mum are heading off tomorrow to see him. maybe this time i can say I love you to him before he dies.

as for my girlfriend, we have split, not on good terms which i wish i could have had, all my exs i have split with have been on bad terms...

the reason we split, well i wanted to split with her was because i had a lot of pressure from the following things..

1) Granddad dying, i love the old man to peices, he always encouraged everything I did and have done, he praises the UltimateRhoads community including Frank and has enjoyed hearing Matt's song In Your Dreams, he is a teenager in heart, always have been, makes me laugh where my nana despises Ozzy Osbourne (or Osmond as she called him) yet granddad can listen to Ozzy and enjoys. (He also enjoys Cradle of Filth, he found them to be interesting..) But when it comes to juggle between a girlfriend and Granddad, i know which side i want to be.

2) I am heading to uni in september and to juggle a girlfriend and Media Production course, i cannot afford to slip up, if i slip off i could end up loosing my dreams of working in Film/TV/Theatre/Media.

3) She is 15, 16 in april and her mum really doesnt take to me because i am 18. 19 soon. and was always suspicious im just gunna dive into bed have sex with her straight off. which causes me to tip toe around her mum a lot, no matter how hard i try to do a good impression i never feel good enough, i spoke very kindly and always have done, i mean once we were talking and i said

"I hope i havent done anything to make you angry"

what she replies?

"Oh no you haven't... not yet"

ya know? I cant just live in fear thinking im gunna slip up a lot.

4) I have been trying and trying to stop my cousin from making a big mistake, but to no sucess, this mistake could cost him his heart to break and not only that to be in danger.

All and all.. I have a lot of pressures at the moment.. and right now a commited relationship is not what i need.

So life is fun..

Simon

Simon... you're too young to worry about serious relationships right now. You're doing the right thing by refocusing on your future and school. Once you are in a good place with YOURSELF, everything else (girlfriends, etc...) will fall into place, and you will have so much more to offer the right girl at that time.

15 IS too young for a 19 year old who is about to go to "uni" (i love that, we call it college here. lol). Your relationship would probably suffer once you were gone anyway because you will be doing some serious maturing and she will still be a "highschooler" if you know what i mean.

As for your granddad.. i am so sorry to hear it. my thoughts are with you, man. It's good you have some great memories of him, though.. and that you bonded so well with him... some people go there whole lives never knowing a grandparent, ya know? your life is much more rich having had the time you had with him and connecting on those levels with him. cherish it and when you think about it, smile... don't be sad. i know that's easier said than done, though.

haha... i had no idea you were 19... that makes ME a dirty old lady for some of the comments I've made to you -- if nothing else, that should at least give you a small laugh.

highpriestess wrote:
haha... i had no idea you were 19... that makes ME a dirty old lady for some of the comments I've made to you -- if nothing else, that should at least give you a small laugh.

lol.. well im fine with that.. lol..

I admit, it is for the best.. its just i dont like hurting people, never have and never will.

I'm always willing to help everyone, i am always the ear to my friends, i always listen to people when they want to cry, but when it comes down to it who will rescue the rescuer.

I am always refered to as a gaurdian angel by some of my really close friends who ive helped since they first admited to having a problem.

Simon

you will, inevitably, in your life, hurt people. What matters is that it isn't your intention to be malicious. The fact that other poeople matter to you is a GOOD character trait, even if it gives you grief at times, because it;s better than the alternative (being a shitty person). But, no matter what, you cannot lose sight of yourself and what makes you happy and what you know to be the right thing.

in the immortal words of fine-ass Matt McConaughy (LOL!) "you gotta do what Randall Pink Floyd wants to do..."

Gah. I remember 19. You go to college, dammit! At 19, I was pregnant with my first kiddo. - now imagine yourself in THAT boat.

Things are already looking better, huh.

highpriestess wrote:
Gah. I remember 19. You go to college, dammit! At 19, I was pregnant with my first kiddo. - now imagine yourself in THAT boat.

Things are already looking better, huh.

lol ive already escaped from having kids and being married.. i was engaged twice and had one pregnancy scare.

things are better now, cos ive let it off my chest (my feelings not my clothes ) and having someone talking to me, makes me feel better.

Simon

Simon,
My thoughts are with you. Please let us know how things went.
Take care. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.

Simon your head is probably well messed up at the moment and as the 'girls' pointed out your better off thinking about your future / carreer.I know what your going through with your Grandad.It's a hard thing to cope with believe me i had to see my parents both die my father then my Mother a month later.If it's any comfort you wouldn't want your Grandad to suffer any longer then he already has, and in a way i thought it was for the best for the same reasons when my Dad died i knew at last that his suffering was over and he was at peace.. Time is a great healer and thats all it takes time...

Take it from someone who put too much emphasis on women and not enough on myself, you'll regret your actions later in life if you don't just follow your own path towards your own life.

When the time is right, the right lady will be there to share the life you've made. Your future with a partner is a life of share one another's futures. It's not about you trying to fit into her plan or trying to fit her into your plan. That never works.

Find a plan (some call it a dream) for your life and follow it. In time you'll find someone who's plan intersects with yours and the two of you can morph your plans into a beautiful life.

Trust me, I'm an old guy who has made the mistakes. I have regrets. I pray that you won't when you are my age.

Hi Simon

As you know I have great compassion for you I will write in a practical way so it is clear.

Your Grandad's time is limited and his memory/spirit will be there forever ...your girlfriend is very temporary in comparision. So at least for the time being block her in your mind and stay focussed at the task at hand.

In the words of your great self "dweebs forever!"

Your friend

Matt

Matthew wrote:Hi Simon

As you know I have great compassion for you I will write in a practical way so it is clear.

Your Grandad's time is limited and his memory/spirit will be there forever ...your girlfriend is very temporary in comparision. So at least for the time being block her in your mind and stay focussed at the task at hand.

In the words of your great self "dweebs forever!"

Your friend

Matt

I will keep focused on granddad, I am heading off to see him soon, my uncle is picking me and my mum up and taking us both down there. As much as I dont want to loose my granddad I dont wanna have him suffer, I know that his eternal spirit will stand by my side, always.

hehe, Dweebs forever Matt, Dweebs forever!!!

Your friend also

Simon

GUITARIDOL5682 and Paul Wolfe

Thank you, your words just makes me feel clearer, I have my dreams, and to be honest, I dont wanna let any girl come between me and the dreams I have, and Paul, you tell me you hope i dont have regrets by the time i am your age, i've had a few but nothing a good glass of milk will cure but thank you, thank you two, for helping

Gina

I will keep everyone updated and thank you for your thoughts and prayers. I hope you and the family are good, especially "Rocket"

Simon

Hello Simon

We have spoken in private about your Grandfather and I told you about when my own grandmother passed away a couple of years ago. We had never been close when I was young but when I got into my 20's she began to tell me about her life as a child, she had to steal food to survive, sexualy abused by her Grandfather and often living on the streets because her mum was too poor to pay the rent. When she passed I told her story to friends on the net, they put candles in there windows to mark her passing. It was lovely to think that lights were burning across the globe for the sick tired woman who had gone to happier place.

Give your Grandfather our regards and be with him, understand why it's better that his pain has gone. He will always be with you even when he is no longer here.

The GF well relationships come and go, and I don't think good friendships remain with the ex's thats just how it is. Only the future counts now, her Mum was always going to think the worse. I bet that when you are ripping through your Uni' studies life will just get better and better .

And what is this about you and High P' ? I will not have this kind of thing at UR your both banned!!! only kidding look how you can rely on us to gather around and give true support great bunch of people we have here at UR.

And from me my thoughts are with you and your Granfather and I will have a candle ready to light for him when you/if you are ready.

Ian

Trigger wrote:
And what is this about you and High P' ? I will not have this kind of thing at UR your both banned!!! only kidding look how you can rely on us to gather around and give true support great bunch of people we have here at UR.

I didnt do nothing *cough, looks left, looks right*

Ya know, on this board it is friendly, and i love how when one of us down, we are all like wolves, we come together and help each other out.

This is why that I laugh at the people who percieve rock and roll as an evil community, yet look at us, I am hurt, and yet you all bring me back up again.

Simon

Sorry things aren't going so well for you simon
No one wants to lose a loved one but as you said yourself, his spirit will alays be with you.

Things will get better once you settle into uni though, may i ask, have you decided where you're going to study?

rice_pudding wrote:Sorry things aren't going so well for you simon
No one wants to lose a loved one but as you said yourself, his spirit will alays be with you.

Things will get better once you settle into uni though, may i ask, have you decided where you're going to study?

Media Production BA. Hons. at University of Cumbria!



Simon